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Subject: How to stalk your EX:
Replies: 23 Views: 3220

acidized 5.04.14 - 04:16pm

Your attempts to get your beloved's attention just haven't paid fruit yet? Haunted by thoughts of them with their new lover, whispering sweet nothings to each other while you freeze in the bushes outside their window? Let's face it, it's time to get creative.
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tool 5.04.14 - 04:17pm
fk em off * +

acidized 5.04.14 - 04:20pm
When you watch your beloved sleep from the bushes outside their bedroom window at night, take notes. It shows them that you care. Feel free to take some pictures too.

When you are watching your beloved from your designated bush, be sure to send them a text message to let them know that you are watching them. Don't forget to compliment them on their attire, be specific. This works best if you do it at night.

[link]http://uncyclopedia.wikia.com/wiki/HowTo[/link] * +

acidized 5.04.14 - 04:24pm
Send gifts every single day (with your brand new credit card), such as dead animals. Everyone loves animals, but hates to take care of them. These can be presented directly, as gifts -- say, a dead cat on the doorstep (white to symbolize purity, perhaps). But you can do better. Arrange them to spell out messages of affection. Using their innards works great too.


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obsidian21 5.04.14 - 04:24pm
Or phone them from their room and ask them where are they. They will answer 'I'm in my bedroom' and you tell them if they were in their bedroom they would be talking face to face to you.(Suggestive) * +

acidized 5.04.14 - 04:29pm
More accurate link to 'How To'[link]http://goo.gl/Ps9zLF[/link] * +

acidized 5.04.14 - 04:31pm

Wow you're a seasoned campaigner. (bow) * +

obsidian21 5.04.14 - 04:40pm
(Idol)spyes movies are good after all * +

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